Well, Nathan called the realtor yesterday and made an offer of $115,000. She called the seller and he said he couldn't financially go lower than $125,000. Nate pointed out to her that if he sits on it for 6 months and gets his price, it would be the same as if he took $120,000 for it right now. She said we were the first offer and the man thought he could do better. Nathan said "Well, you have my number." I had been in prayer constantly all day yesterday, claiming God's promises and holding on to ALL He has done thus far to open doors and the fact that He had given Nathan peace and assurance about it finally, too. I know that God can do this, I just don't know if He will. Does that make my faith "wavering?" It seems like the Lord has orchestrated everything up to this point for it to work out- drawing me closer to Him in prayer and giving me complete peace about it, giving Nathan the unexpected very nice raise, bringing the couple needing a place to rent into our path, (the mom of the girl even told me yesterday that they said it was their "dream house!!!") lining up the financing, and the biggest thing- getting through all of Nathan's concerns and giving him peace about it. It doesn't seem as if God would do all this just to have it not work out. He hasn't closed the door yet, though, and I am clinging to that. I continue to pray that the Lord would give wisdom and provision to Nathan, and incline the sellers heart towards us. Really, if it is going to happen, it needs to happen soon. The couple getting married soon are going to need to have a place to live all lined up, and if they can't have our house, they are going to sign a year contract someplace else, and if we don't have renters, we can't afford to do this anyway. I just felt sick to my stomach last night, and couldn't sleep for hours. I didn't say much to Nathan. I was afraid if I did, my sinful flesh would just yell "I can't believe you're going to screw this up by being your cheap self?!?!" But, I just bit my tongue and took a hot bath instead. It is foolish of me to believe God worked everything out this far and then believe that somehow my husband is just beyond the Lord's control. I know God is in control, He already knows what's going to happen. I think I have just gotten my heart and hopes set upon this too much. We were at Nathan's parents on Monday night and we were all talking about things we would do once we moved in next door and where we would put furniture, etc. Perhaps I have gotten my eyes off of the Lord's hand in favor of seeking what is in His hand. I need to spend some time today with the Lord. I have been in constant prayer, asking for the Lord's help and provision and blessing; maybe I need to spend more time seeking His praise and worship and will. I am still praying for it all to work out, though. I believe it is the Lord's will, and I will continue to think so until He shuts the door definitely on this.

I made dinner yesterday for my friend who has just been diagnosed with cancer and brought it over to their house in the afternoon. I didn't see her or her husband while I was there, just a few of the kids and the girl who is caring for the children right now. She said that Karen was not doing well at all. I know she had been on morphine for pain when she was at the hospital, I don't know if she has anything she can take at home, but she must still be in terrible pain. Just being in their home and knowing all that is going on with them just broke my heart. This is definitely one of those times when you just want to ask God "Why?" Their faith and testimony through all of this has been amazing, though. It has certainly served to refocus my attentions on what is truly important and being thankful for all the Lord has blessed me with. My little worries about this house situation definitely pale in comparison to all that they are going through.

Well, Ian is still in his pajamas, I should get him dressed and try to get some things done today.