Wednesday, June 20, 2007

So, I've decided to start blogging again. I don't really have a great reason for starting again, other than I just feel like it is time. There was a long time where the thought of it just didn't "jive" with me right, and I knew it would be wasted time trying to convey anything, when my heart wasn't in it. Not that my blog has ever been anything super special or deep or anything like that, I just didn't have any creative energy left over, nor even any will to record my day to day. I think the last few weeks of my pregnancy with Claire were just very taxing- mentally, emotionally, and certainly physically. Then the delivery and even harder recovery time was one of the hardest times I have ever been through. I have noticed a trend with myself....it's as if when I am going through something hard I just fight so fiercely to pretend everything is okay and I just need to buck up and be tough, and it's only when I am on the other side of it and am doing better that I realize how bad it had been. Anyway, all of that to say that I am doing well now, we are finding a new normal...(as much as the chaotic environment of 4 extremely rambuncious children can ever BE normal, heh.), and I feel the time has come for me to be able to blog a bit once more. (Man, that sure was a lot of words just to say "Here I am again.")

This change is also facilitated by the fact that I finally figured out how to hook up the wireless keyboard to the laptop, so now I can actually type!!!! How Now Brown Cow...instead of having to hold down the "fn" key to use half the keyboard, never being able to use the Enter key, ??????? key or the Backspace key. Yup, that is annoying. "Gee, Charity", you ask, "why did you have to do all that???????" Well, I'll tell you, it was because my perfectionistic, super careful, non-clumsy husband and I went out to a coffee shop with wifi while I was pregnant. We brought the laptop to look at baby names online. We got coffee. And Nathan said to me, (the non-perfectionistic, ditzy and clumsy one) "Now make sure you don't spill YOUR coffee on MY laptop!" And then, guess what happenend!!!!!!! NO, you're wrong, I didn't spill any.....Immediately upon uttering those words, he dumped half his cup of coffee all over the keyboard!!! And I did not laugh, I mean, well, I was totally laughing inside, but I didn't want the other half of the coffee to be on me. So, needless to say, it just doesn't work very well. But that is no longer an issue, Praise the Lord!!!

So, what shall I actually blog about today??? Well, I could talk about the kids, of course, as they are the consuming factor in my day. The fact that George is getting impatient with me to hurry up and order his school books, that Ian is still having trouble keeping his underwear dry, but is making some leaps in communicating emotional things through words instead of just screaming, that Grace has been somehow ending up on Nate's pillow at 5 every morning now all week and she does NOT go back to sleep, that Claire is getting humungous, like her little five-month-old, almost-out-of-a-size-2-shoe-feet are already sticking out over the end of her infant car seat. That's a very quick summary of the kids for this moment.

And Nate is plugging away at the busy season, working a ton of hours and keeping his head above water only just. I tell you, that man is amazing. He is the one that all the disgruntled customers call, the one who always picks up the slack at the stores, the one who stays late, who runs to customers houses "on his way home" and just does an amazing job at all the myriad of responsibilities he has to do. Then he comes home and I see the canker sores in his mouth, the cracked and bloody skin on his feet, the dark circles under his eyes......and the huge smile on his face. He thrives on it, in a funny sort of way, and I am trying my best to be his best support when he is home. I know he just craves time with the kids and hates that he is missing out on so much, but we both know he is where the Lord wants him to be, and he is doing it heartily.

Then there's me. I don't know what to say about me. I went to the chiropractor this morning, for this annoying recurring pinched nerve in my shoulder, and Dr. Rob said he really wanted me to come back tommorow too, because my neck was so incredibly tight from being so out of alignment. And I will. I just get used to doing things a bit compromised and don't notice until I am better, how worse I was....you know, it's just like I was saying before. The whole frog in boiling water thing. Anway, speaking of that, I am feeling a ton better today after slowly beginning on a kidney infection that I have finally warded off with great amounts of Cran-Flush from North American Herb and Spice, cranberry fruit capsules, tons of water and my vitamins, which I had been failing to take for quite a while. When I get sick like that, it's like there is just this black hole of unconsciousness inside me just sucking the vitality out of me, and I have to struggle just to be able to think clearly enough to make the decisions I need to to get better. But I did, and I am getting better now, although I do desperately need to get started making my good bread again. I think I am just going to have to break down and buy a mixer thing. With my shoulder out half the time now, I just can't knead bread dough.

Well, I did something excuciatingly painful today, okay, not actually physically painful. I went bathing suit shopping. I can almost hear the "Oh, you poor thing"'s now. Now bathing suit shopping isn't fun at any time. (unless you are like a super toned size 2, I suppose, I wouldn't know.) But, when you are 20 lbs over what you should be, and you've had four kids in five years (You want to guess at the state of my stomach muscles?!?!?) then it is especially yucky. But, I did actually find one, and had to about pull my hair out to convince myself that spending $35 dollars on something that makes me look like a neon sausage is actually worth it. I haven't taken the tags of yet, though, we'll see what Nate says.

Well, look, I have already written a bunch. I will try to do some more tommorow, and who knows, it might even be interesting then. By the way, if anyone actually read this, please leave me a comment, I'd love it!!! Have a great day!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Charity, I've been faithfully checking your blog for months knowing that you'd eventually be back. I'm SO glad you're back in the blogging world!!!! I love hearing about your day and how your kids are doing. Have a wonderful Thursday! =)

Misty said...

I'm here! So sorry you are feeling sick. I hope it all goes away fast and none of the children get it. On another note...do you think you may have a bit of post partum depression?

Dawn said...

The neon sausage picture is priceless!

Anonymous said...

Oh so you have 4 rambunctious kids huh? I have 8 of the same!! Glad to have found your blogetti blog!